Giving UP

Triton - Future NBAer

Triton – Future NBAer

My son plays basketball and he is very competitive about the game. While he is playing he seems most at peace with himself, at least this is how I see him. He is all smiles and confidence mixed with an excitement I don’t see on his face, all the time.

This past holiday season he had one basketball game and things did not go well, they actually haven’t been going well the whole season. It might be pertinent to mention that he is ten (10). So, the teams are often uneven and there is no such thing as try-outs or cuts at this stage in the game. To my sons utter dismay, talent is not a requirement. He takes this seriously, to say the least. And to continue with my story here, after this last game the coach left right after the game, with his 11-year-old who is on the team, without a word to the kids, parents or even shaking hands with the other kids. Then later that afternoon we got his resignation email as team coach. Seriously?!

So, this grown man pulled his son off the team and quit mid-season as the coach because of what he called an inequality issue with the teams. Well, to be fair we did get 4 kids that have never played before and some of the other teams are calling plays and seem pretty cohesive, compared to our Bad News Bear’s. But when I tell my son, Triton, that the coach quit and why, he says “Well, that’s not a very good example for us kids, now is it?” I should also mention my ten-year old often sounds like he is about 27! 🙂

So, even though I had an entirely different blog prepared for my date with you all, I wanted to talk about Giving Up! What makes one person give up and another try harder? Wouldn’t it be nice if we could somehow pick and choose our personality traits? I want to be brave and virtuous, I want to be resilient and a risk taker. I want to be the kind of person who never gives up. I suppose in some ways we do have the ability to change our spots. We can all decide each moment to be exactly who we want to be rather than maybe who we are inclined to be. I was recently told that I am brave and a risk taker because I am putting all I can into writing and giving this dream of mine a try. I didn’t even occur to me that it was brave…the risky part I sort of get though! 🙂  51UI1w5VJHL__BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-arrow-click,TopRight,35,-76_AA278_PIkin4,BottomRight,-54,22_AA300_SH20_OU01_

So this new year I wish you all to be brave, to try something new you have always wanted to try. I wish for you the moments where you get to every bit the person who you crave to be, even if for only a few moments at a time. For me I am going to keep pushing on, keep writing and pursuing this crazy dream of mine to be a bestseller!

Happy Lucky (20)13!!

All the best,

Kelly Rae

Happy New Year 2013
Happy New Year 2013 (Photo credit: Mark Kens)
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13 Responses to Giving UP

  1. Your kid sounds very smart for a ten year old. With his coach quitting, he learned a valuable lesson. Some people can’t take the heat.
    Being an indie author is taking a risk…and being brave at the same time. I know of authors that are ‘one book wonders’ in traditional book publishing. One book was all they had. Maybe. But with indie publishing, no writer has to be a one book wonder anymore. All they have to do is write the next book, and the one after that, etc., etc., etc.

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  2. He is often too smart for my own Good! I just keep telling myself to keep moving forward, keep writing and the readers they will come and the goal, the dream will follow them!

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  3. Jill James says:

    Kelly, you have an awesome kid there. Following our dreams is hard. There are many naysayers and doubters along the way. All we have is our belief in ourselves. Your son is a bright young man.

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    • Jill, he is dangerous and is constantly trying to negotiate using such tricks as logic and good sense to win battles. LOL I am in for a great ride with this kiddo, for sure! And he has also perfected the puppy dog eyes….oh boy! 🙂

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  4. E. Ayers says:

    i think there are plenty of one book writers out there. They only wanted to scratch write a book off their bucket list. There are plenty who have written two or three books only to discover there’s more to indie publishing than getting a friend to check for errors in their books.

    Maybe your son’s team looks a whole lot like indie publishing. The good players will rise to the top, because they do take it seriously. They care about their teammates, about the game, about the score, about fair practices, they care about their own performance, and they want to be the best!

    I think Triton has an excellent role model with his own mom. He may not wind up with the NBA, but the lessons he’s learning along the way will shape him into a good man.

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    • Thanks E.
      He is a big part of why I decided to go for it in the first place, lead by example. 🙂
      There is so much debate about the Indie world, good or bad you are right the cream will rise. And if this group is any indication, there is a lot of cream out there!

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      • E. Ayers says:

        It’s not easy to raise children today, especially as a single parent. You’re teaching him that dreams are worth following, success is work, and quitters never succeed!

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  5. monarisk says:

    Kelly, enjoy your son and his big boy wisdome. Kids grow too fast. It’s wonderful that he enjoys basket ball. It helps him focus and learn that hard practice and perseverance lead to success. Unfortunately, the coach failed to give a good example to his son. I’m sure you too will reach your goal.

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  6. leighmorgan1 says:

    Sometimes people are not suited for the challenges they find surrounding them and they choose a different path. Sounds like your son’s coach wasn’t suited for the position. When children see this they feel let down, even betrayed. That’s such a hard lesson to learn, but it’s not about them, it’s about an adult (one they’re supposed to look up to) not being able to deal. It’s harder still when you 10 year old is more adult than his coach. People give up for all kinds of reasons. I’m with Pepper, giving up isn’t an option, but sometimes re-tooling and moving forward is necessary, especially in e-pubbing :). Triton sure sounds like a young man who will grow into a fine, honorable, caring man who doesn’t give up when things are tough and winning is a long-term game. He sounds amazing, focused and wonderful. Congrats on raising that kind of person! He must have one hell of an example to pattern himself after!

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    • Leigh,

      He is the most amazing person I know and I think I would think that even if he wasn’t my kid. My sister and I went to see Guilt Trip, the new Barbara Streisand movie last weekend. At one point in the movie she tells her son that if they had lined up all the little boys and giver her a choice, she would have picked him every time. I would say the same. It was a great single mom movie, especially if you have a son. Here is to all of us making all our writing dreams come true! 🙂

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  7. Carol says:

    Triton’s coach not only short-changed his own son, but his team. It’s sad that father’s can’t see what they’re teaching others by their actions. Hurrah for your son. He’s quite the little man!

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