Do You Have It?

Do You Have It?

More the question, what is It? Where do you find It? Does everyone have It? Are you born with It?

It – is Charisma. Many people I admire have a personal Charisma. Sandra Bullock, Meryl Streep and Sally Field have Charisma, as do other magnetic actresses and actors. Clark Gable had It. John F. Kennedy had It. My grandmother had It, and I admired her more than any other person I know.

You can find It easier than you realize. Look around, check out your family, your friends, and yes even your enemies!

Not everyone has It. You don’t need to wonder or look for It in everyone. They either have It, or they don’t. It is the missing link between someone being able to make an emotional connection to one person, a room full of people, or leave you wanting to move a little further away from them and never return to their side.

It is Sensitivity – is Charisma. Sensitive people draw you in and make an emotional connection by responding to your feelings. My son has a special expressiveness that others respond to, though I’m not too sure he realizes that about himself. That he has It.

I’m not sure everyone that has It, is born with it. I believe It can be taught, can be learned. But…it all depends on how sensitive one is to the human race. I believe that’s part of It. A huge part.

You can find more about me at


About Carol

Carol falls in love with every character she writes in her books. She loves basing them on the good and the bad personalities that make up life. That's what makes them real. Carol feels as though she’s in a movie when visualizing characters and she jumps right onto the page with them. Often the theme of her books is forgiveness. Whether planned or not, forgiveness sneaks its way into her stories. That's okay, because Carol believes forgiving others is essential. She favors a great story, with slices of twists that cause her to reflect on the problems life throws at us and how we react. Carol believes in happy endings. Humor is a big part of her stories and daily routine, and yes, she laughs a lot! Travel is one of her favorite things to do. She dabbles in art, always has popcorn and hot chocolate on hand. Carol is a small-town girl at heart and her stories are peppered with a dose of humor, based on Southern roots. She currently resides in Georgia with her husband and family.
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21 Responses to Do You Have It?

  1. Anonymous says:

    I don’t have it, evidently. I watch people I’ve been “friends” with for years invite other people I considered friends into their inner circle, but never me. I’m always the kid on the outside, the one with their nose plastered against the window watching everyone else have fun. I wish I knew how to connect with others. I try. I retweet their tweets, share their FB posts, etc, but they rarely return the favor. Even in my own family, I’m the outsider. The more I do for others, the more of an outsider I feel. So if anyone has advice, I’d love to hear it.


    • Carol says:

      Anonymous, I agree with the other ladies posts. Never belittle yourself. Be you. Be wonderful you. You’re one of a kind.Love yourself. Don’t worry or focus on what others think of you. Yes, we’d prefer that others like us, but if not, that’s their choice. You also have a choice. Choose to be the best person you can be. Be blessed.


  2. Tori Scott says:

    Anonymous, I can really relate to your comment. Being an author oftentimes feels like being back in high school. I was never one of the “popular” kids back then, either. I’ve always been an introvert and though I care deeply and often get my feelings hurt when that caring is ignored or not reciprocated, all I can do is just keep trying. If I never become one of the “in” crowd, then I’ll be my own person and succeed or fail on my own.

    My advice? Quit worrying about others for awhile. Concentrate on taking care of you, going after your own dreams, making yourself the best you can be. And someday, when you’re a success and people want to hang on your coat tails, you can be the one to decide who gets let into your inner circle. At that point, you won’t care who didn’t let you into theirs, but you’ll be more sensitive to those who really need your attention.


  3. Jill James says:

    I’m pretty sure I don’t have It, but that is okay. If everyone had It, It wouldn’t be so special. But I do admire those who can just create a circle of friends and make them all feel like the best friend.


    • Carol says:

      Jill, I wonder if we really recognize if we have It? ‘Course there are factors. Like you said, It is special and not everyone has It. Thanks for posting.


  4. Apparently other people who know me the best think I have it, but I never thought I did. Tori, I can relate to the high school comment and not being part of the “in crowd”. I still feel invisible at times, passed over. Those darn teen years sure leave an impression. I try to stay open now, on my own time that is.

    Anonymous, never give up being who you are.I like what Tori said.


  5. E. Ayers says:

    I think they are born with IT. That baby who has never met a stranger… while others cling to mommy. But have you noticed that books seem to have IT, too? An unknown can toss a book out there and for some reason it will take off with mega sales. It’s not that the particular book is better than everything else, or that the story is so much better, or that it has a super cover. It just has IT. Maybe we need to look for the IT.


    • Carol says:

      Love that I’ve noticed books have It also. Lol. I’m with you on looking for the book It! 🙂 Yes, there is the difference in babies. Some are outgoing some are clingy.


  6. leighmorgan1 says:

    We all know “It” when we experience “It”. You’ve done a fabulous job describing something so intangible and ephemeral. Great post.


  7. JoanReeves says:

    Interesting post, Carol. Charisma is what others feel about a person. I believe that feeling comes from what a person projects to the world, and that is based on a person’s self-identity.


  8. monarisk says:

    Great post, Carol. I think people are born with IT. My granddaughter is only six and you should see how everyone smiles and laughs when she talks, while her cousins and siblings don’t attract the same attention. She can get away with murder because she’s so funny.


  9. Carol says:

    You’re blessed with a special granddaughter! My granddaughter was the same way. My grandson is charismatic also. I love it! 🙂


  10. Tori Scott says:

    My two grandsons are a lesson in “It.” The youngest is the attention-getter. He’s involved in theater, holds center stage whenever there’s a dance floor around, and is always the life of the party. The other is more academically inclined, quieter, often moody. I’m more drawn to the quieter one, but that’s because he’s more like me, I think.


  11. What a blessing! Two wonderful sides of the coin. 🙂 The quieter grandson may turn out to be a writer also!


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