Friday Writer’s Forum, The First Glance

I host a Writer’s Forum on my blog, every Friday where I talk about the craft of writing and try to give writers the opportunity to share their work. Here’s a recent post.


A number of years ago I had the opportunity to hear Linda Howard talk on the twelve steps of intimacy, a talk she based on the works and studies of Desmond Morris, author of The Naked Ape. I found it fascinating. I began watching for intimate “tells” in the people around me. (Yeah, I’m an avid people watcher and eavesdropper, unless I’m thinking about a story I’m writing, then I’m pretty much oblivious. It’s a toss-up as to whether I’m dialed in and taking mental notes or I’m in my own stratosphere. I’m a risk.)

Today I want to talk about that first step of intimacy—the first glance. How many of us can recall the first instance we saw our spouse? I can, although it was more than 31 years ago. He sat on a nubby green, ugly sofa, friends on either side of him. He wore blue corduroy pants that matched his eyes. Of course, I didn’t know I had reached at a life changing moment, but I had. I also didn’t know that after he left, he told his friends that he had first dibs on asking me out. I don’t remember what we said to each other—knowing me, not much. But voice to voice is step three on the intimacy ladder, and we’re talking about step one— the first glance.

Dr. James Dobson, author of  Love for a Lifetime: Building a Marriage that Will Go the Distance, also recounts the 12 steps of intimacy. He wrote:

 A glance reveals much about a person — sex, size, shape, age, personality, and status. The importance people place on these criteria determines whether or not they will be attracted to each other.

When the man and woman who are strangers to each other exchange glances, their most natural reaction is to look away, usually with embarrassment. If their eyes meet again, they may smile, which signals that they might like to become better acquainted.

Here are the first glance moments in three of my novels.

A mean wind blew the clouds shrouding the moon and a beam of light landed on a lone figure near the bow.  She fought the wind for her hat and her hair, a tangle of dark honey, swirled around her head. The hat, pinched between her fingers, caught another gust, set sail and skittered across the deck.

The woman managed to capture her hair into twist, and she looked over the deck in his direction. Her eyes widened when she saw him and she backed up against the rail.

Stealing Mercy

The intruder flipped on the switch in the kitchen—her kitchen—and flooded the dark with yellow light. Penny pressed herself up against a tree, hiding and watching. Tall, thin, blond, dressed in faded jeans and a button down white shirt that offset his tan skin and startling blue eyes—he didn’t look like a Lurk. His gaze peered into the dark, looking past her and focusing on Wolfgang. “Shoo!” he called. “Go home!”

Losing Penny

Blinded by fear mingled with rain, Blair ran into a large, warm expanse of flannel. For a small moment a slicker engulfed her, and then she tangled with an umbrella. She slipped on the wet pavement and fell hard on her hands and knees. The creel landed beside her and the cat cried in protest. Rain and embarrassment washed over her. She pulled the creel onto her lap and checked its strap.

  “Are you all right?” A tall man with wavy, honey colored hair gazed at her with kind green eyes.

Stooping to pull her upright, his large hand swallowed hers. “You’re shaking.”

The Rhyme’s Library

Please feel free to share your own, either real life moments, or story moments…they’re all good.

About Kristy Tate

USA Today bestselling author Kristy Tate has come a long way from small-town Washington. Her avid curiosity and love of reading have carried her to thirty plus countries. (She loves to travel to the places she reads and writes about.) She's the author of more than twenty books, including the bestselling and award-winning Beyond Series and the Kindle Scout winning Witch Ways series. She writes mysteries with romance, humorous romance, light-hearted young adult romance, and urban fantasy. When she's not reading, writing, or traveling, she can be found playing games with her family, hiking with her dogs, or watching movies while eating brownies. She is also a popular public speaker and presents writing workshops for schools, libraries, and fundraisers. All proceeds donated to charity. References available upon request.
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6 Responses to Friday Writer’s Forum, The First Glance

  1. Jill James says:

    I’ve known my husband since we were in 7th grade. We had a small school and everyone knew everyone. Years passed, and I was working at a trucking company and the boss asked if I would go on a date with his son if he asked me. I hadn’t been on a date in 14 months, so I said yes.

    He walked into the office in uniform (cop) and I was lost. I was speechless. I suppose I said yes to going on a date since we went. LOL We dated for 8 months and he proposed. We got married 6 months after that.


  2. leighmorgan1 says:

    Still remember being snared by the look of warm invitation in my husband’s eyes. Still love it when he looks at me like that. 🙂 Thanks for the post!


  3. Tori Scott says:

    First glance did it for hubby and I. He has the prettiest eyes, and they were so honest and sincere it melted my heart.


  4. Mona Risk says:

    I love your first glance stories. Just like in my novels. Real life was different for me.It took me two years to say yes to first date, and then it was a yes for life..


  5. E. Ayers says:

    I saw my future husband and barely paid attention to him. But he was watching me the whole time. When I finally bothered to actually give him a few moments of attention, he had the prettiest dark eyes with the longest, plushy, thick eyelashes. They say eyes are the windows to the soul.

    We met in Oct and were married in Nov. At least one of our daughters got those pretty eyes and lashes.


  6. The same thing happened when I met my husband. One look and that was it. He’s still the best looking man around. We dated for four months, then he went overseas, returned a year later, and three weeks later we were married.


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