I’m sure you’ve all heard the sad news about actor Robin Williams. At first I was shocked. He was such an engaging man, full of laughter and caring. How could he be depressed enough to take his own life? And then I got to thinking.
We’ve all known a class clown. That kid who never takes anything seriously, the one who acts out, the star of the show. I have a family member like that. And like Robin, he ended up addicted to alcohol. I watched the downward slide, the inability to talk rationally, the justifications and anger. That’s when I saw the person behind the mask, and it wasn’t the clown.
Can you imagine the burden of a man like Williams, always expected to be “on” and happy and entertaining? If you’re suffering from depression or bipolar disorder, like Williams, that has to be a terrible burden. I know when I go through phases of depression, I don’t want to talk–to anyone. I stop answering email, I don’t make phone calls or even want to leave the house. I couldn’t imagine being expected to laugh and make jokes and be the life of the party.
When we write our characters, one thing we have to do is look deep inside. What drives them? What makes them the person that they are? Not all of the answers end up on the page, but it’s only by knowing our characters’ deepest secrets that we can give them depth on the page. We have to know them to know what they will do in each situation, and why. Otherwise, they will only be cardboard cutouts, flat and uninteresting.
I’m currently working on a sequel to Lone Star Justice. This point in writing a book always goes very slowly for me, because I don’t yet know my characters well enough. My heroine is just now beginning to reveal her secrets, her fears and flaws. The hero still refuses to talk to me. He’s still a flat cutout, just waiting for me to figure him out. But I will. I’ll dig and push and search until I know what drives him, what scares him, what excites him. I’ll figure out his past and how it affects his present and future.
And when I do, he will be a whole man, not a stick figure hiding behind a mask. He will love and laugh, and he will hurt and tremble. And in the end, he will overcome it all because he is, after all, a hero.
If only real life were the same. My heart goes out to Robin’s family, because there is never just one victim in a case of suicide. Everyone who loves him is a victim.
Rest in Peace now, Robin.
If you know someone suffering from depression, or anyone who has ever even entertained the idea of suicide, learn what you can about the disease and how to help. Mostly, just always be available to listen to them when they talk. And if you ever find yourself in that downward spiral, reach out for help before it’s too late.
- Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
- National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI)
Authors of Main Street 
Thank you for this excellent and heart-felt post. Like everyone, I’ve been trying to process Robin Williams’ suicide. After dealing with and overcoming his addictions several times in the past, I can see how he just couldn’t find the strength to do it one more time. The pain must have been too great for him to bear.
I’m looking forward to reading your sequel to Lone Star Justice and meeting your characters. Best of luck with getting to know them yourself!
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RIP, Mr. Williams. You will be missed. Timely post, Tori.
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We can never know the demons the people around us fight. It’s so sad and shocking that someone as brilliantly talented Robin William could be in so much pain and the whole world hadn’t a clue. Blessings to his family.
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I saw him once in San Francisco. I was visiting my company headquarter, and the President took us to a very big restaurant for a celebration. Everyone pointed and whispered, “Here is Robin Williams.” I passed next to him and said, “Hi”. He gave me a big grin, “Having fun?” I wish I have answered something smart instead of smiling like an idiot. He was such a wonderful actor.
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I have fond memories of Mork & Mindy. He was able to be hilarious one moment, and then sweet and vulnerable the next.
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Reblogged this on Kelly Rae & Jocelyn Bell Books and commented:
Amazingly thoughtful post by my fellow Authors of Main Streeter, Pepper Phillips. Please read & join the conversation!!
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Tori, I think you speak for the world who found such pleasure in Robin’s performances. It’s almost a truism that the clown is always crying on the inside.
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Yes, your post is timely. Who know the demons that lurk in people’s minds. Some good must come from Robin’s death. He was a special person. Good luck with getting to know your characters.
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I agree that we all have our own demons and so do our characters. Flushing them out is often very difficult. As I wrote Campaign, I realized just how wounded Ryn was and how much she tried to hide her fight with depression. I could have glossed it over, but I realized that she, like everyone else in this world, is not perfect. I chose to let it happen, and for her and Brad to deal with it.
Losing Robin Williams is so sad. Had he died of natural causes, we would have all accepted it and moved on. But suicide seems so pointless… so unfair… so preventable, and that makes it harder to accept. He had a fast wit and that’s what made him so darn funny.
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